Stress vs. Overwhelm

I had the pleasure of joining Johnny Newnes on his podcast, “What’s the Pasta”, and talking about stress (obvi).

Listen here.

As I am listening to it now, it is making me realize how many definitions we have of stress, and why it’s so hard to get people to understand what it is. Let’s talk about the differences between stress, stressors, and overwhelm.

Stressors are the demands or challenges that cause stress. 

Stress can be a positive experience that leads to growth. For example, exercise can be stressful, challenging your physical abilities, but it ultimately leads to increased strength or endurance. Learning can also be a positive stressor (depending on your mindset), allowing you to further your skills, increase cognitive performance, and build skills to plan and organize. 

Stress can be an emotional state: it is the experience of strain, tension, or pressure, often resulting from our resources being taxed or exceeding our capacity to cope. Johnny noted how Brené Brown conceptualizes overwhelm in her book, Atlas of the Heart. Overwhelm is extreme stress where one feels unable to function, and as a result we need to do nothing. Radical rest is required. 

I often explain these two experiences in terms of Polyvagal Theory (by Steven Porges, PhD). Stress is a state of mobilization, you can think of it similar to anxiety or fight/flight responses. In this state there is still something we can possibly do. Overwhelm on the other hand is an immobilization response, a state similar to freeze responses, or depression, where it seems as though there is nothing you can do, so your best bet is self preservation. 

In order to move back to a place of calm, or as Porges calls it, back to being socially engaged, resources need to be activated. Which resources? Well that will depend on the intensity of your stress.

Interested in learning how to measure the intensity of your stress? Check out our 21 Days to Less Stress course!